You A Bad Girl And Your Friends Bad Too!!

DAVEENAH

With Her Ace Boon Coons Tiana and Delisa
Do you have a best friend or best friends that you love to death? Celebrate your friendship by submitting your favorite pictures of you and your ace boon coons. It doesn’t matter if they are natural, man, old, young, related or not. All that matters is your desire to rep for the ones you love!
Submit pictures  

Reflections On Motherhood – Kristin

                                                                                                                                                                             
How many children do you have? How old is your child(ren)?
I have two beautiful little boys, Joseph is (nearly) 9 months and DJ is 3 years old.
If you could tell your tell pre-baby self anything to prepare for motherhood, what would it be?
I would say, “SLEEP CHILE!!!” My oldest wakes up every day at 6am…holidays, weekends, weekdays, EVERY SINGLE DAY! What I wouldn’t do to sleep to 8am….
The times are definitely a-changing. The stay at home, betty crocker-esque archetype of motherhood is being redefined. In what ways do you think you are re-defining mother-hood?
I breastfeed my youngest and plan to until he is ready to stop or is 18 months old, whatever comes first. I get a lot of mixed opinions about it. Some feel it is “gross” or “inappropriate”, others applaud me and envy my dedication. My sons’ doctor has even asked that I nurse in the waiting area to sorta influence mommies-to-be and other young mothers. It is a decision I made while pregnant that I feel very strongly about. Breast (milk) is truly best and I feel blessed that I have had the opportunity to nurse…some don’t even get the chance.
What has been your greatest challenge as a mother?
I am a worrier. I worry about everything all the time! My greatest challenge has been (and is still) fighting the urge to put them in a huge plastic bubble to keep them safe from everything. When you have children you truly want to protect them from any hurt, any pain, basically anything that is unpleasant at any measure.
I am still learning that they will have to fall, mama cannot be there all of the time. Life is about experiences and I have got to let my babies live life.
What has been the most rewarding aspect of motherhood?
The most rewarding the aspect of being a mother is the love that I feel and the love I see reflecting back at me in those (two sets of) big brown eyes. I was once told that becoming a mother can only be described has “having your heart outside of your chest” and it is true! The love is amazing and nearly indescribable!!
What do you wish the most that your child cultivates and keeps in his/her adulthood?
My oldest is very sweet! He goes out of his way to wish every person he sees a “good day!” What I love most is that he has no prejudice; he wishes everyone a good day…homeless (and homeless looking), men, women, hetro, non-hetro, black, white, yellow, red. He is color blind and has no bias. He is also very observant. He notices whenever I do anything different, no matter how slight, to my hair and nails. Every day I hear, “nice hair mommy, I like your orange toes!” He is going to make some lady very happy one day, and by one day I mean 30 years from now! lol
How do you maintain your sense of self against the constant demand for self- sacrifice and constant vigilance as a mother?
Now that is something I struggle with. Just this year, I’ve made a pledge to do something *for me* monthly, whether it be something as simple as a long bath uninterrupted or brunch with the ladies. “Me time” is very important for sanity.
Do you have anything to share to the anticipating or new mothers out there?
I would tell anticipating or new mothers out there to simply enjoy the NOW. With my first child I was always trying to push him into the next thing, when he started sitting up I couldn’t wait for him to crawl, when he started crawling I could wait for him to walk, etc. I really didn’t take time to enjoy the moment -at the moment. The cliché saying “they grow up before you know it” are the realest words ever spoke. Mommies enjoy your babies! They’ll be toddlers then teenagers then grownups before you know it!!!
                                                                                                                                                                      
What beautiful beings. All three of you. 
Thank you so much for sharing Kristin. 

Phylicia Rashad’s Letter to Her 21 Year Old Self

source
“Dear Phylicia,
Romantic involvement distracts you and can blind you to what’s really in front of you. And what really is in front of you? You are. You don’t even know yourself yet. You think you know and you want to assert that you do, now that you’re a certain age, but you don’t. What’s in front of you is a whole world of experiences beyond your imagination. Put yourself, and your growth and development, first. There are long-term repercussions to what you’re doing now. Everything you do, every thought you have, every word you say creates a memory that you will hold in your body. It’s imprinted on you and affects you in subtle ways—ways you are not always aware of. With that in mind, be very conscious and selective.”

With high hopes for you,

Phylicia

 If you could write a letter to your younger self what would it say?

Our Definition of the Around The Way Curl

She is the approachable girl. She is far from perfect. She doesn’t want to be perfect. She comfortable with who and how she is. She fights through her insecurities, fears, trouble and heartaches with resiliency and memory so that she only moves forward. She is intelligent and driven to success by listening to her heart and trusting herself. She is funny, witty, caring and teeters masterfully between the worlds of sweetness and sexy without being too naive nor aggressive. She is strong but soft enough to share her burdens with those she trusts. She is the loyal best friend, a daddy’s girl and her mother’s pride. She is the good girl often overlooked and under represented.She is us.
not only do we want to redefine beauty, WE  also aim to alter the NEGATIVE stereotypes THAT ARE often associated with being an around the way, neighborhood girl. 
so, WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU! E-mail us what your definition of an around the way curl is along with a picture.
 IF YOU’RE a shy curl YOU CAN SIMPLY COMMENT BELOW. BUT WE ENCOURAGE YOU TO SUBMIT AND SHINE YOUR LIGHT ON THE WORLD .
SEND US your pictures and 
define yourself

Strong Enough to Bare the Children Then Get Back to Business

Haters just won’t be tolerated. You’ll be blocked from the blog and all future events : ) Seriously though, Bey is amazing not because she’s beautiful, seemingly has a perfect life and stunts all day every day but because her SHE WORKS HARD FOR ALL OF IT. Her work ethic has not been matched by many.
See what we were saying in this post? 
GET. ON. YOUR. GRIND.

Shanti’s Twist Out Technique + SheaMoisture Curl Enhancing Smoothie and Mix Chicks DC Product Review

natural hair, twist out, curly hair, styling, around the way curls, tutorial
Me and my young jawns Andrea and Natasha
So during and after the Curl Daze event, I have received a lot of questions as to how I styled my hair. It is really quite simple and I thought that I would give you all a pictorial of how I did it. I also tried a couple of new products for this style. I used Sheamoisture Curling Enhancing Smoothie as a styling/hold product and Mix Chicks deep conditioner as a pre-styling treatment. Want to see it? Here we go!
I began with freshly washed hair. I then deep conditioned with Mix Chicks deep conditioner which I allowed to sit on my hair for an hour before rinsing. After rinsing, I applied Kinky Curly Knot Today leave-in conditioner to my wet hair followed by a light almond oil. 
I then parted a side part in my damp hair and began to do FLAT two strand twists. Before twisting I took a quarter size amount of the SheaMoisture and applied it to the section of hair that I intended to twist. My product application was as follows.
1. Kinky Curly Knot Today Leave in
2. Almond Oil
3. SheaMoisture Curl Enhancing Smoothie
 I twisted 3 twist on one side and two twist on the opposite side, ending with 4 twists in the back. The reasoning for this is I wanted to twist my hair in the direction that I want it to fall. I want my hair to fall dramatically to the side therefore I parted on the side nearly passed my right eyebrow. This leaves me with more hair to manage on one side then the other. That is my intention. 
natural hair, twist out, curly hair, styling, around the way curls, tutorial, flat twists
Side part with 3 FLAT twists going to the side
natural hair, twist out, curly hair, styling, around the way curls, tutorial, flat twists
2 Twists on opposite side
4 (or is that 5) FLAT twist extending downward.
I then covered my hair and went to sleep to allow it to dry. Upon waking and getting ready for my day (pictured) I made sure my hair  was completely dry and began to carefully unravel my twists.
natural hair, twist out, curly hair, styling, around the way curls, tutorial
I then take the side with less hair and smooth it towards the back securing it with this handy dandy device that can be purchased at your local drug or beauty supply store.
natural hair, twist out, curly hair, styling, around the way curls, tutorial
After pinning the top hair to also go to the side. Here are the results. Easy Breezy.
natural hair, twist out, curly hair, styling, around the way curls, tutorial
natural hair, twist out, curly hair, styling, around the way curls, tutorial, flat twists
natural hair, twist out, curly hair, styling, around the way curls, tutorial
                                                                   
The Product Reviews
SheaMoisture Curl Enhancing Smoothie = C
Price – I liked this stuff. It worked alrite for my wash and gos. The twist out was questionable
The price is so reasonable. Just 9.99 for a huge tub of great quality, no nonsense ingredients.
Hold – It gets a B for wash and goes but a C for twist outs.For my wash and goes the curl is well defined and soft. For this twist out my hair felt really fluffy and ready to poof up at any minute. Maybe I should have been more generous with my application but it just did’nt hold that well. It did for my twist out for the event though. Hmmm? I will have to do some experimenting. It may be my human error 
Smell- Sweet baby Jesus this stuff smells great.    Overall scoring – Even though I didn’t have the most stellar results, I believe that the SheaMoisture brand is soon to reign as one of the most effective and beloved hair products in the natural hair community. It’s a quality product with a reasonable price. It can’t get no betta. Mixed Chicks Deep Conditioner = A- Scent- In my opinion it was awful. It smelled like I had dish detergent on my head. Not my cup of tea Slip- I wish there was more slip to this DC. It did not give me the glide that I was hoping for. Nonetheless it is incredibly thick. To me, that is the way a DC should feel- like creamy thick gunk. Just do not expect to be able to detangle with ease with this in your hair. Moisturizing qualities- Mixed Chicks did their damn thing! I must say Mixed Chicks leave-in conditioner does nothing for my hair. My hair laughs in the face of that stuff but my hair was shook like a mugg when their DC came and laid the smack down on it’s dry ass! I left the DC on for an hour and upon rinsing, my hair felt great. It did not rinse with a tacky, weighed down feeling that some DC cause. Instead, my hair felt really clean and light yet extremely moisturized and happy. I am writing this review 2 days later and my hair still feels great. I really recommend those turned off by Mixed Chicks leave in conditioner to make room in their hearts for their DC because the brand deserves redemption. The Mixed Chicks deep conditioner is the bomb.com even if it smells like dish detergent. Have you tried these products? What were your results?

How to Stay on Your Hustle When Your Not Rick Ross

As you all know from this post, I am a visual, sensory, “here and now kind” of person. I am an artist so I tend to be sensitive about my shit. A creative writer, visual visionary. Alright, alright, alright…I am a procrastinator and hamster brain. I either avoid doing shit or I forget about it!!!
But don’t get it twisted. That does not mean I’m not a hustla. I’m grind city when I feel like it. I’m focused and capable of pure genius…when I feel like it. Unlike Antoinette, who is a lunatic machine and should actually go to sleep somewhere because it’s been days since she has eaten, slept or had a real conversation with another human being, I need reminders on how to stay on the daily grind of pursuing my dreams. So for those who also suffer from the artist’s plight of ADD and procrastination – Here are some tips to keep you everyday hustlin’, hustlin’, hustlin’.
1. Make a damn “To Do” list.
Be reasonable and write down everything you need to accomplish that week. Do not include future things. Just the immediate, necessary things you actually CAN DO. Tape that ish somewhere where it haunts you. Your bathroom mirror, computer screen, child’s forehead, wherever…
2. Listen to Beyonce and watch her videos.
Even if you don’t like her do it anyway. She will be your motivation. This woman rehearsed for hours, promoted a new album, toured for months, sold out shows and DANCED IN HIGH HEELS ALL WHILE PREGNANT and making the damn effort to HIDE THAT SHE WAS PREGNANT!!!! She is the mayor of grind city. She has the keys to grind city. She recently just had a gold statue made of herself and presented it to everyone at the city hall of grind city. She will inspire you to work harder and go the extra mile. Pregnant. Dancing. Heels.
3. Surround yourself with other people that are motivated.
You will lose if you are not surrounded by people that are not attempting to move forward in their lives. You have to associate yourself with people that can teach you, inspire you and correct you. That’s why Antoinette is my best friend!
4. Say good bye to sleep
If you are working at YOUR FULL POTENTIAL, you don’t sleep. 5-7 hours become the norm. Coffee becomes water, concealer becomes necessary, shit still doesn’t seem to get done. You love every minute of it though.
5.Never make the same mistakes twice
If you are truly hustling, you are paying close attention to your journey. You are learning, growing and appreciative of your failures. In the words of John Maxwell, at times it may feel like you are “failing forward”. Nonetheless, you don’t stop. In every experience you are learning, encouraged and wiser.

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